Unbox yourself

When someone tells me "I have been seeing you from your childhood, you have not changed at all", I feel like replying "Well, I am using restroom now".

When someone says "You have a computer brain" (of course, It has been years since I have not heard this), I am sure they either do not know me or computers because I know that I am not so dumb.

When someone says "I know you have seen so many ups and downs and crises for a long time in your life. You fought them bravely. God is great. Good times have finally come now.", I know for sure this person does not know about me. One, they are confused whether to give compliments to me for fighting problems or to God for rescuing me. Two, they are insulting me by telling that I am not smart enough to get the crises resolved quickly and for taking "long" time. Three, they think that there are separate bad times and good times. (I think they follow Vijay Mallya - King of Good Times who made banks' times bad).

If we observe carefully, we understand why such communication exists! Why people say 'You have not changed, yours is a computer brain, you have seen a lot of ups & downs etc.?

Let's see.

We are busy pleasing others. We somehow know that others generally like compliments, everyone generally enjoys their sorrows and hardships. They like to be recognized or appreciated for undergoing such hardships. Most of us find happiness in 'believing' that good times are running or they are about to come. This is the base for most of the astrologers. Boosting ego is the strongest weapon in taming a person.

What's wrong if we feel happy for appreciations or praising that we receive? Well, nothing wrong if the appreciation is objective, specific to some points observed in us. But most of the times people give vague compliments just to please others, boost egos.

Well, what's wrong in being happy if someone praises us even if vaguely?

Initially it pinches when someone gives compliments for something that we do not deserve. But as the time passes, we start believing that we truly deserve and start accepting compliments without any such 'pinch'. Then we start enjoying and expecting compliments. We stop being happy for what we are! We stop enjoying our core 'I'ness. We become intolerant to genuine criticism. Without our knowledge, we start acting what we are not!

So, I decide: "I am happy to be copper. I have my own qualities, strengths and beauty. Let vague appreciations not create an electrolytic plating of gold around me. Gold may have its own value. But I am happy to be copper"

So, when someone gives any compliment, it is up to you whether you right click and say "Ignore all" or "Add to dictionary"